My Hero (and what he's taught me about Life)

I know a lot of people. When you've been around for close to 5 decades and have run your own business for nearly 2 of those decades, you get to see a lot of faces.

Some of these people come and go, some of these people come and won't go (no matter how hard I try) and some people I wish, would come around more often.

To say I'm the person I am today without meeting all of these people would be a flat out lie. I am who I am because of all of them, and there's no real one individual or one specific interaction that I can put my finger on and say because of that, I'm now this, or because of her, I started that, it's all a combination, really.

That is, with the exception of one person. My Dad.

My Dad is My Hero. And it's even hard for me to begin to type this without tearing up, so I'll see how this goes. I don't even know where to begin.

My Dad isn't "educated" in the literal sense. He never went to College or University and from what I've understood he was seldem at High School. When he brought us (him, Mum, sister and me) over from the Philippines, he was in his late 20's and basically started working in a factory to make money to support us in our new life, in a strange country, in a single bedroom where all 4 of us slept. Lesson One - Be Courageous.

The work was tough, and it was long, and the pay was underwhelming. He found out that he could earn more by doing the afternoon or late night shifts and working weekends. A normal life with normal sleeping patterns and time with the family? Who needs that? Lesson Two - Make sacrifices for the greater good.

After years of sleeping days and working nights, he (and my Mum) had saved enough to buy a house. Now they needed to furnish it, do the garden, build the fences, get concrete, buy cutlery and crockery and pay bills like any normal home owners would, oh and pay to put my sister and I through school too. Lesson Three - Set Goals, Work Hard, be Determined.

Now, my Dad is by no means perfect. He's fucked things up before that really hurt the family, but thankfully he's apologised, sorted himself out, and it's all well in the past. Enough said about that. Lesson Four - Admit your mistakes, and go about fixing them.

He's been retired now for about 5 years, yet he's still up every day keeping busy. He'll help at my house, or my sister's, run errands for Mum, help with the family, do things for friends, all to keep himself busy. Because he knows if he stays still, he'll start to slide. He's seen it before with other people, and he doesn't want it to happen with him. So keeping busy keeps his body in shape and his mind working, and seeing people helps him stay connected. Lesson Five - Have Self Awareness.

Now I love my Dad to death, but if there's one thing my Mum and Sister struggle to understand and comprehend, is his selflessness. Honestly, it's a blessing and a curse at the same time. He's easily closer to Zen than anyone I know which at times is unfuriating ("Hey, they're just taking advantage of you") and other times, astonishing (I wish I could just give and give as he does, without question). My Dad just wants everyone to be happy and have a good time (in life!), and if he can help you with that, he will, and if you've ever been at one of his parties where the alcohol flows freely, you'll know exactly what I mean. Lesson Six - Give without expecting anything in return.

As a result of the above, I believe Karma has treated him well. For a physical specimen to have smoked as many cigarettes and drunk as much alcohol and done the crazy shit as he has; and still do what he's able to do, with the strength of a farmer, the stamina of a runner, the mind of MacGyver and the wit of a comedian (all with a crazy full head of hair), is nothing short of amazing. And I know it's all from the good that he does. Now he's not the richest person, but he makes his dollars work extra hard. Sure, he has things in life he'd like to buy (a Holden Maloo always gets mentioned), but if given the choice between his life now, or changing it to have more money at a sacrfice, I'm sure he'd pick status quo. If you could put a dollar figure to love, and family, and connection, and happiness, and gratitude, and purpose, it would make him the richest man I know. Lesson Seven - Wealth isn't all about money.

My Dad's still around, and I am grateful for this every single day. We see him at least twice a week. And he never stops helping, or asking how we are, or smiling, or cooking food, or dropping literally anything he's doing to help us out, others out, strangers out. If I could do/be at least a quarter of what he has done/is, I will consider this life to have been a super successful one. Lesson Eight - Help others / Be a Hero.

Love you Dad

dEx